All it takes is a smile

If you are familiar with Enid Blyton books you would know about this town which comes alive in the morning...you can see people from all walks of life headed towards work..you see smiling faces everywhere ..people exchanging hellos and good mornings .. The streets are abuzz with warmth and friendliness, with teeming life ..

Where are those towns now..where are those friendly familiar faces .. I wonder ..

I wake up in the morning to the hustle and bustle of my house mates..people grumpy and sleepy ..complaining about something (Someone mutters a good morning ).. already stressed out about their day in office (No one is looking forward to it )..
I get dressed and step out of the house not heeding to my growling stomach, promising myself that i will have breakfast and leave tomorrow…

I squirm the moment I am out on the street...The traffic as usual is maddening...I almost get run over by someone everyday .. I am cursing the traffic ,the traffic police man ,the guy who almost ran me over ..I am wishing it will not be long wait for the shared auto through which i commute .. I am blaming the government for not doing enough to make the public transport more efficient.. As my auto finally takes off , I am amazed at how people get away with rash driving .. I am hoping (sometimes praying)that my auto guy doesn't bang into anyone .. I try to switch off and try and think of more pleasant things .. None seem to come by ..There is no escaping this chaos.. As I look around i see tired,drained out faces..faces which look older than they already are .. I see eyes staring blankly at the horizon, not looking for familiar faces ..eyes lost in the pandemonium…..

The auto guy finally drops me in front of my office... As I give him the exact change he smiles at me and says thank you .. I smile back .. wondering when was the last time it happened ..
The smile has it’s effect on me .. Suddenly I feel rejuvenated.. I am happy to be alive ,to be working for my dream company ..
I smile at the guard standing at the main gate ..he smiles back and says good morning.. It is a “good morning” I say to myself !!

Happiness stays with you forever

I have had my share of failiures ,setbacks ,disappointments ,misfortunes ,tragedies.... But It is the happy moments which stay with me today.. The pain is gone.. The misery is forgotten.. There is no bitterness.. I have learnt my lessons,healed myself of the pain and now I don't remember the friend who wronged me,The race I did not win ,The grandfather who never loved me,the boyfriend who jilted me ,the time when no one seemed to love me .. The memory seems so distant and the pain so insignificant..Today when my day is not going too well ,I remember the laughs I shared with my friend,how good it felt to run in that race(still can hear my pulse racing),the stories my grandfather would tell,the butterflies in my stomach when I thought I was in love,the birthday when the room was filled with all the people I loved ... I smile when these memories come back to me , they make me feel alive again. I want to recreate those moments.. The memories give me hope.. Happiness is just around the corner and this will pass too...

There are faces I will remember all my life..Though some have gone and some remain...

My dad had a transferable job so we used to move around a lot .. I have changed five - six schools in all ... Although I have managed to keep in touch with all my close friends but sometimes on a rainy day when I have a cup of coffee in my hand I wonder about people whose names are no longer etched in my memory but whose faces I keep dreaming of ...These were not close friends ,maybe not even acquaintances ... This could be someone who used to be in the same bus .. a guy whom I had a crush in school but never even got to know his name ....
It could be that girl on my bus stop when I was in my second grade .. I remember we had a lot of meaningful conversations while we waited for the bus .. (about the neighbor’s dog who had puppies in our garden last night , about how many planes went past my house last night , about the new teacher who gave so much homework ... ) I wonder what that girl whose name I did not bother to remember must be upto .. Is she still skinny and tall ..Is she doing better than me ..More importantly does she remember me .. Does my face haunt her the way her face haunts me on lonely nights.. Does she think of me fondly ...

There are so many such faces .. Mysterious faces .. These are the faces which make my past ... I wouldn't have had memories if they were not there ...

I had a friend in fifth standard who was my playmate .. We used to go to the same school and lived in the same colony .. They were five sisters ...I used to spend a lot of time at her place .. Sometimes in my dreams I see myself in that dark house ... I can hear her parents shouting at each other ..
It all comes back to me .. But when I wake up it's gone .. I forget about her as I brace myself to face a new day .. a new challenge .. But while I am taking that bus drive to office I think about my dream and wonder what my friend must be upto now ... what she must be doing right now...

Some of these faces which keep coming back to me have names ..... Thanks to orkut I have been able to find these faces.. Some of them remember me .. Although it gives me immense joy to hear from them ,I don't know what to say to them .. I don't know where we last left our conversation. I don't even know if there was any .. The fact is I don't want to know what those people are upto today .. I don't want to know if they are married and have children... Because I want to wonder ...Next time it rains I want to daydream about these people .. I don't want to know where they are now because with them , I am still living in the past ...